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CHRIS'S UNPREDICTABLE and OCCASIONAL Newsletter
for MAC USERS # 54
12/05/02 Special Dark Side Issue
Contents Copyright 2002 by Christopher Plummer
THIS ISSUE
OCCASIONALLY we take a look at the DARK SIDE. In this industry, that
means we see what is going on in the world of Microsoft. What are they
up to? This issue took a month because I nearly drowned in the quagmire
of dark chi emanating from the monopoly. To get in the mood, I recommend
that you watch an episode (any episode) of 'Pinky and the Brain'. Or
just wade through the Strange News, News, and analysis provided here.
You might prefer the cartoon. You see, walking hand in happy hand with
Microsoft is our new Single Party Government, and I couldn't look at
MS without getting into the Dark Side of Privacy, Spying, and the Internet.
Fortunately, there are many good articles out there, and I point you
to them. There's a little Mac stuff here, but if you'd rather not hear
about those whacky, gene-spliced mice, then just skip most of this issue
and we'll see you next time! Meanwhile, there's no fascinating Mac trivia,
insightful comments, and only a smidgeon of personal commentary of questionable
merit. Back by popular demand, I leave Apple alone! :-)
UPDATES - (X) Office Combined Updater
WEIRD NEWS - MS Wins "Weasliest Company" and Bill gets Big
Condom!
NEWS - DELL Down, Gateway a Goner, Intel In Trouble, MS Weasels into
Handhelds, More
SQUEEK SPEAK REVIEW - "The Windows Standard"
What is Microsoft Up To? - What are we going to do today Brain?
Know The Difference - Switchers? or Fake Switchers?
Trustworthy Computing - ExecSpeak Translation
OCCASIONAL Favorite WEB SITE - Beloit College Mindset List
Special Bonus Keyboard Commands - (9, X) Yet Another Internet Exploder
Tip!!
UPDATES
MS Office Combined Updater 10.1.2 - All wrapped into one updater, the
updates for office, Ms security patches, etc.
<http://www.microsoft.com/mac/DOWNLOAD/OFFICEX/OfficeX_1012.asp>
Weird NEWS
Steve "The Brain" Ballmer
"Vows Responsibility", Assures Brookings Institute - "When
the antitrust lawsuit started, most of our industry did not race to
support us. But we listened to our supporters and we listened to our
critics," the Microsoft CEO said. Mr. Ballmer did not explain how
"listening" has changed the behaviour of the monopoly which
he runs. With the possible exception of Microsoft stockholders and the
Justice Department, the rest of the world was not reassured. (See next
story.)
SORRY you'll have to pay to get the archive of this one..
<http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/articles/A44377-2002Nov12.html>
Rapacious Redmond Reaps Rare "Weaseliest Company" Award
-In a survey conducted by comic strip artist Scott Adams, creator of
corporate stereotypes; Dilbert, Dogbert, Ratbert, Catbert, and the Pointy-Haired-Boss,
Microsoft was named "The Weaseliest Company". Microsoft out-weaseled
it's closest rival, Arthur Andersen, by a huge margin. Other weasels
included Enron, WorldCom, and Tyco. In the political arena, the Democratic
party out-weaseled the Republicans, no doubt because of the Democrats
perceived lack of spines. More weasels at the site:
<http://www.dilbert.com/comics/dilbert/index.html>
<http://www.comics.com/poll/show_results.jsp>
Gates Honored with Giant Inflatable Condom -"Microsoft Chairman
Bill Gates, who announced Tuesday that the Gates Foundation will spend
$100 million over the next decade to slow the spread of AIDS in India,
encountered a unique...manifestation of the India's thanks in the rising
technology hub of Hyderabad: an eight-foot tall air-filled condom."
<http://abcnews.go.com/wire/SciTech/reuters20021114_139.html>
<http://www.guardian.co.uk/aids/story/0,7369,838353,00.html>
NEWS
#1 Computer Maker Dell is Down and Doomed - "Michael Dell,
company founder and chief executive, said its success reflected growing
demand for PCs and servers built with industry-standard components."
The beleaguered head of the beleaguered company seemed unable to understand
that his company is not meeting market expectations and its stock price
has fallen dramatically.
<http://biz.yahoo.com/ft/021115/1035873311193_5.html>
Gateway A Goner- The folks at Gateway (the company with the pathetic
"me too" commercial claiming their PC is better than an iMac)
recently revealed that they are the subject of an SEC probe started
in 2000. "The disclosure was another blow to the money-losing company,
whose share of the personal computer market has dwindled as it struggles
to compete against rock bottom prices from companies like Dell Computer
Corp." In related news, the beleaguered Bush Administration's inability
to staff top positions at the SEC has instilled confidence in overpaid
CEOs that investigations such as the one at Gateway may go nowhere.
<http://biz.yahoo.com/rb/021115/tech_gateway_stocks_4.html>
Intel Releases 3Gig Chip, Merrill Lynch Downgrades Intel - Let's
say that again: Intel released the latest Pentium (or is it a Xeon?
Or an Itanium? Heck, who cares?) with a high end Tachometer speed of
3 Gigahertz. You can have one of these screamers for only $637 (if you
buy a thousand of them). The current 2.8 Gig Pentium goes for around
$400. So now you can get a super-fast chip for the price of what was
formerly a super-fast PC!! And I challenge you to find a Pee Cee Weenie
who can run Microsoft Word and Excel and TELL THE DIFFERENCE in speed.
Apparently Merrill Lynch analysts agree with this Unpredictable assessment
- they've downgraded Intel stock from "Neutral" to "Sell".
<http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&u=/nf/20021114/bs_nf/19980>
Japanese Government Considers Abandoning Windows -
TOKYO "The ruling Liberal Democratic Party's panel on promoting
electronic government asked the government in August to develop or introduce
an open-source program for security reasons, it said."
<http://japantoday.com/e/?content=news&cat=4&id=239325>
Microsoft/Samsung to sell Pocket PC - In a recent media event,
Bill "Pinky" Gates and Steve "The Brain" Ballmer
announced their foray into the world of Pocket PCs. Gates, holding the
Pocket device in front of Ballmer and glancing nervously at the audience
asked, "Well, Steve, what are we going to do today?" Ballmer,
casually using a handkerchief to wipe the sweat from his large-let's
say very large-and shiny forehead replied in exasperation, "The
same thing we do every day, Billy. TRY TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD!!"
The dubious duo is at it once again, using the enormous coffers produced
by the Windows monopoly to buy their way into a market where they otherwise
wouldn't stand a chance - in this case PDAs. Although around 48 percent
of PDAs currently run Palm software, Microsoft has nearly doubled its
market share from a year ago to 30 percent. Now the giant marketing
machine is going to focus on selling PDA hardware in a partnership with
Samsung.
<http://www.reuters.com/news_article.jhtml;jsessionid=LX0JKD0BK5ABECRBAEKSFFA?type=technologynews&StoryID=1719735>
Microsoft SEC filing shows hideous losses except for Windows
-"MSN lost $97 million on $531 million, CE/Mobility was out $33
million on $17 million revenues (always a good trick, this kind of stuff),
and the home of Xbox, Home Entertainment, dropped $177 million on revenues
of $505 million"<snip> "it's clear who's paying the
rent for these expeditions, and it's also clear that Microsoft is the
dominant force in the PC market, and only the PC market. It can afford
to shoulder big losses in the areas where it wishes to be the dominant
force for a very long time. Which is fortunate, because in several cases
these look suspiciously like ventures normal businesses would be forced
to put a bullet into. Now."
<http://www.theregister.co.uk/content/4/28128.html>
UNPREDICTABLE READER FEEDBACK
Just the usual Accolades (Thanks!)
SQUEEK SPEAK REVIEW
The Windows Standard - "The Windows standard" is a
Dilbertian corporate catchword that for most people means, "not
new, creative, or innovative, but a safe choice", this translates
into its other definition, "job security". To those in the
trenches it means any of a bizillion different versions of a so-called
operating system from Microsoft. How many versions of "the standard"
are there? Even the experts can't say. For example: Windows 1 thru 3.1,
Windows 95, Windows for WorkGroups, Windows 98, Windows ME, Windows
NT, Windows 2000, Windows XP, Windows "Multi-media" edition,
Windows CE, Windows Pocket, Windows Tablet. Microsoft makes this even
more difficult by re-naming the same version whenever they give it full
networking capabilities, throw in a new Media player, or add some new
cursors or screen savers. (Fortunately Microsoft's 50 person strong
Cursor Department is always ready with a fresh idea!) The good news
is that no matter how many versions there are, or how different they
are, or how well they work with each other or with applications, the
world of Big Dumb Corporations can safely assure it's employees and
stockholders they are adhering to ONE COMPUTNG STANDARD: Windows.
WHAT is Microsoft Up To?
"Pinky, are you pondering what I'm pondering?"
"I think so Brain, but how do we get the Dinosaur cursor to spend
less time running?"
"You imbecile Pinky! I'm pondering the significance of Trustworthy
Computing!!"
Save time, just skip this article and say to yourself, "Same as
it ever was," but things may never be the same...
Innovation - Except for the contractual innovations of its massive
Legal Department, Microsoft has never been known for creating anything
new or different. But things are changing! Our Friends in Redmond have
come up with these nifty new markets!
"MM PC", "Microsoft Media", "Microsoft TV",
or whatever they're calling it when you read this. In short, Microsoft
is promoting Windows as a TV Set. And as a TIVO video recorder. And
as a place to do your video editing. The computer even has a Remote
Control and you can hot link a TV show to Word or Excel!! Where do they
come up with these great ideas?? PC users have been able to buy TV Tuner
cards from several vendors for years, but now they don't have to go
to all the trouble of buying something from someone else! Who would
rather watch TV on a Sony TV Set when they could watch it with WINDOWS
on a Hewlett Packard or Dell PC?
Windows "Pocket". So what if Apple invented this market with
the Newton, and Palm developed and perfected it? They're just little
companies without standards. Nobody knew what "Windows CE"
was, but Windows Pocket! Now you can have a PDA that runs WINDOWS!!
Be sure to get "Pocket Word" and "Pocket Excel"!
Windows "Tablet". Smaller than a regular laptop, bigger than
a PDA. Microsoft has it covered! The Tablet PCs have handwriting recognition!
Be sure you get your special versions of "Tablet Word" and
"Tablet Excel". Several of the hardware manufacturers have
done some neat stuff with Tablet PC hardware, such as making the flat
panel display flip around so you can use an external keyboard and get
the rest of the "tablet" out of your way. Or move the display
to portrait mode, or completely flip the display around on the rest
of the unit to make it work like a clipboard.
Lock In The Users - Microsoft is trying to move all users to
"Subscription Licensing", a concept introduced a few years
ago, it's based on the idea that you don't "own" your software
or operating system. In a sense this has been always been true of software
licenses. But Microsoft has concluded it would be easier for everyone
if users pay a "subscription" fee each year not to receive
support, not to receive upgrades, but merely to continue using the software.
In businesses and schools the fee is based on the "number of workstations"
on the campus, regardless of how many of those are running other operating
systems. This makes it easier for auditors, trustees, and IT Managers
to ask the sensible question, "Gosh, if we're paying for all these
Windows licenses, why should we use other computing platforms?"
Hmm. I wonder if someone at Microsoft thought of that?
Oaths of fealty are not yet required to use Word and Excel, but the
payment of tribute is taking on a new look. In his Thursday, Nov. 21,
2002 "Circuits" column for the New York Times, David Pogue
rails against Microsoft's latest licensing variation, the "Software
Assurance Plan":
"As proof that companies have no choice, consider Microsoft's new
Software Assurance plan, in which corporations must pay for Windows
and Office upgrades three years in advance, without even knowing what
the new features will be -- if any. Microsoft locks in the profits,
eliminates any incentive to improve the software and prevents customers
from trying out alternatives. Two thirds of its corporate customers
have complained bitterly. But in the end, all have fallen into line
and ponied up the fees Microsoft demanded. It was simply too expensive
for them to switch to anything else."
And you think that's not having a choice? Boy, have we got news for
you! Okay, it's that UNPREDICTABLE time when I have to stop being funny.
The real plan to take over the world is the plan to take over YOUR world.
Listen up. Pay attention. Even if you're lucky enough to never use Windows,
this could have an effect on you and your Mac.
Lock Everything, Lock Out Apple! - Microsoft's next big version
of Windows is codenamed "Palladium". What's the big deal?
The scope of the plan is vast, reaching from individual files on your
desktop, to CDs in your car, DVDs on your basement TV, the TV itself,
what you hear on the radio, what is broadcast on television, and everything
that goes across the Internet. I'll oversimplify this and give you plenty
of links if you want real facts.
Apple is on the mark with the 'digital hub' concept. Everything is going
digital. And just what is everything? Basically, all media. Music, radio,
movies, television, even books. In the middle of this mess we have several
big players. The "Content Cartel," consisting of the big motion
picture companies and the big record companies. And the Monopoly Companies
consisting mainly of Microsoft and Intel.
On Microsoft's side, the idea is to create an operating system and hardware
combination that provides a 'trusted platform' that will prevent copying,
thus enticing the Content folks to make all their treasures available.
(You begin to see why Microsoft has been marketing itself as the company
of "Trustworthy Computing" - it's going to take A LOT of Windows
reboots to convince everyone on that topic!) From top to bottom in the
new system, everything is registered, verified, checked, and encrypted.
The operating system will check the processor's serial number so it
can't be installed on a different machine, drives and other input/output
devices will be prevented from sending or receiving information that
isn't authorized by the OS, and of course users will be authenticated.
At this point the plan doesn't (publicly) include embedding a subcutaneous
ID chip the way they do in pure bred dogs or alien abductees, but that
can't be far off. Especially when you hear John Ashcroft talking about
a 'Windows-based' national ID system! More likely than not this new
environment will include new proprietary variations on Internet protocols,
such as a proprietary version of TCP-IP, where every packet of data
can contain the identity of the sender and the recipient, and where
every user can pay the owner of the protocol a fee for its use. Are
you beginning to see that this is all about money and has very little
to do with convenience, creativity, or choices for users?
The consequences of this plan are ominous and go far beyond the "protection
of artist's rights and property" argument that is used to market
them and to promote the related Digital Millenium Copyright Act. This
is not some hacker's New Millenium paranoid fantasy. It's already happening
and has the potential to affect nearly all consumer electronics.
You can begin to get just a hint of what this is about if you buy a
copy protected Audio Disc (marketed as a "CD" but technically,
not one) and discover that you can't play it on your Macintosh, much
less rip MP3s from it.
Windows users don't even have to buy a copy-protected CD to get a taste
of what's coming:
"Windows Media Files (MP3s) Are Tied to Your Hardware - Let me
say this another way: when you rip CDs on a Windows machine using Windows
Media Player, it makes a unique identifier for your computer <snip>That
unique identifier is associated with a license that is stored separately
from the file itself that will only let those files be played back on
the one single computer that matches the unique identifier. No other
devices. Ever."
<http://www.guardian.co.uk/Archive/Article/0,4273,4477138,00.html>
<http://www.onlisareinsradar.com/archives/000477.php#000477>
What happens when these technologies are implemented by the Monopolies
and the technology is not included in Macintoshes? Obviously, Macs,
Linux, and anyone else who isn't on board will be "frozen out"
of access to content. It's starting now in the incipient Internet movie
market, where movie downloads are only available to Windows users:
Online Casting Calls Snub Apple
<http://news.com.com/2100-1023-966115.html>
The "owners" of the proprietary technology could just as easily,
for example, lock and encrypt a Word document so that only a "trusted"
application could open it. And whose application do you think that would
be??
Other writers have covered this topic in great detail. PLEASE read about
it. You can help by educating those around you.
The Evil that is the Digital Copyright Millenium Act
<http://www.tidbits.com/tb-issues/TidBITS-656.html>
"Why we have everything to fear about the next operating system
out of Redmond."
<http://www.technologyreview.com/articles/wo_weinberger102502.asp>
Who Controls Your Computer?
<http://www.smh.com.au/articles/2002/10/22/1034561484653.html>
"It's what you do, not what you say. If you're not part of the
future, get out of the way."
Yea, baby!
:-)
Know The Difference
In a story from way back in the middle of October, Microsoft's marketing
department briefly posted a 'Switcher' ad on their website. In the ad,
an alleged woman writer pronounced her happiness at switching to Windows
XP (from the Mac). Her reasons? She complained that the Macintosh had
no equivalent to MS Office (for Windows), and that she preferred Internet
Explorer over Netscape. Duh! Most people do. But most Mac users also
know that they have choices: not only Word and Excel for Mac, but Appleworks.
Not only Netscape, but Internet Explorer, iCab, Opera, and Omniweb browsers.
The Marketing folks at Microsoft didn't do their homework, the ad was
quickly exposed as a fake, the photo of the woman in question coming
from a CD of 'stock' photos, and the 'real' person apparently a public
relations consultant contracted to Microsoft!
Thanks to Google caching, here's the original ad:
<http://tinyurl.com/22jf>
Microsoft pulled the ad and has been trying to recover ever since. First
they announced that the ad was 'inappropriate' but that in fact the
woman was a real 'switcher' to Windows. Lately Microsoft is allegedly
considering taking 'sanctions' against the woman for pretending to be
a switcher.
With use of language that can only be described as "Bushesque",
MS CEO, Steve Ballmer stated, "I got a piece of mail that was vague
that the assertion is some marketing person did something that was not
entirely straightforward. If that's right, I will certainly castigate
the offender." [Did he intend to say, "Evildoer"? - Chris]
<http://www.macmegasite.com//modules.php?name=News&file=article&sid=400>
<http://www.macobserver.com/article/2002/10/14.14.shtml>
So far as we know, all of Apple's "Switchers" are real.
And That's The Difference.
Trustworthy Computing
Referring to Microsoft's "Trustworthy Computing" initiative
in an interview, MS CEO Steve Ballmer explained, "On the technical
front we acknowledged that nine months ago, and I wouldn't say we've
done a bad job, but customer expectations for what they expect for reliability,
for security, customer expectations were beyond our performance."
Translation of this New Millenium Exec Speak? "Customer expectations
were beyond our performance", means that Microsoft's 'trustworthiness'
has been below customer expectations. That's pretty low. How 'trustworthy'
do you expect Microsoft to be? :-)
<http://www.macmegasite.com//modules.php?name=News&file=article&sid=400>
OCCASIONAL Favorite WEB SITE
The Beloit College Mindset Lists of what incoming freshmen know. For
example, the Class of 2003, #8. "They were born and grew up with
Microsoft, IBM PCs, in-line skates, NutraSweet, fax machines, film on
disks, and unregulated quantities of commercial interruptions on television."
<http://www.beloit.edu/~pubaff/mindset/>
Special Bonus Keyboard
Commands
(9, X) Internet Explorer 5 - Title Bar "Path"
You can [Command]+Click on the Title Bar of a Finder Window to see the
"path" of the current folder. Then by sliding down the popup
menu you can select and open any of the "parent" folders.
But you knew that.
Similarly in Internet Explorer 5 you can [Command]+Click on the Title
bar of the Web page you are currently viewing, and it will display a
popup menu with the "parent" URLs for that sight, and you
can select one and jump to that page. Don't be surprised if the paths
seem a bit weird. (That's just how web pages work!) For example, if
you go directly to Microsoft's Macintosh site:
<http://www.mactopia.com>
and [Command]+Click on the Title bar, you'll see, <http://www.microsoft.com/mac/>,
and <http://www.microsoft.com/>.
:-)
TFSB
** CHRIS'S UNPREDICTABLE
and OCCASIONAL Newsletter for Mac Users **
Oriented towards, but not exclusively for, Mac Users in Beautiful Western
Central New Jersey. Published Whenever - About Whatever!
Non-profit, non-commercial publications may reprint articles if full
credit is given. (Please provide UNPREDICTABLE with a copy.) Others
please contact the editor. Accuracy of articles is UNPREDICTABLE and
not guaranteed. Caveat lector. Publication, product, and company names
may be registered trademarks of their companies.
SEND requests and feedback to <chris@unpredictablemac.com>.
Sample Issue - email with "Sample Unpredictable" in the Subject.
Subscribe - email with "Start Unpredictable" in the Subject.
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Back Issues available to subscribers upon request.
**
SHAMELESS SELF-PROMOTION
My accountant has advised me to come clean in every issue. Yes, I am
a
consultant and am available to HELP YOU on a one-to-one basis. Macintosh
Networking, Internet Connectivity, Desktop Support, Training.
Satisfaction Guaranteed. Oh, and Lotus Notes and Domino Adminstration,
Development, and Support. Interested in help from a long term MAC
Professional? Don't hire some Windows kid who tells you to get rid of
your Mac because HE doesn't GET IT! Send me an email:
<chris@unpredictablemac.com>
TFSB :-)
THE END
SQUEAK SPEAK ALERT: Theme to STEVEN SPIELBERG
PRESENTS PINKY AND THE BRAIN
Music by Richard Stone. Lyrics by Tom Ruegger.
They're Pinky and The Brain
Yes, Pinky and The Brain
One is a genius
The other's insane.
They're laboratory mice
Their genes have been spliced
They're dinky
They're Pinky and The Brain, Brain, Brain, Brain
Brain, Brain, Brain, Brain
Brain.
Before each night is done
Their plan will be unfurled
By the dawning of the sun
They'll take over the world.
They're Pinky and The Brain
Yes, Pinky and The Brain
Their twilight campaign
Is easy to explain.
To prove their mousey worth
They'll overthrow the Earth
They're dinky
They're Pinky and The Brain, Brain, Brain, Brain
Brain, Brain, Brain, Brain
Narf!